the stories of a los angeles violinist

i don't like pumpkin spice lattes

Added on by Jordan Martone.

you read that right. i don't like them. i also don't like pumpkin flavored foods.

i especially don't like your pumpkin-filled ravioli you found on pinterest. gross.

life is rough for a non-pumpkin lover, you're in the fall minority. especially being a white girl. "hey, girl! let's hang out and grab pumpkin-spice lattes!"

*exasperated groan*

i can handle a sliver of pumpkin pie once a year at thanksgiving, with a mountain of cool whip, and no other pie but my auntie's. she has a way with the pies, people.

if any of you share in the struggle of unpopular fall-related opinions, never fear, for i have some tried and true encouragement for you!

 

#1: pumpkin-spice lattes are a lie

did you ever google what's actually in one of those little cups of disappointment? what are those things anyways? i looked it up: 

carmel color

monsanto milk

more sugar than any human being needs in a year's time

"natural flavors" my ass

absolutely no real pumpkin

so is it that i don't like them because of the over sugary, fake flavoring? or because of all the lies they're feeding us? next time someone guilts you for not liking these drinks full of empty promises, don't hesitate to let them know how it really is.

 

#2: pumpkin scented candles are really friggin awesome

having a dinner party with fall-fanatics? light a pumpkin scented candle. because do you know what's really in those things? mostly cinnamon. have you ever smelled the inside of an actual pumpkin? because it smells ga-ross. candles combine all the fall spices and scents that we love and put a wick in it. so next time you need to impress your friends and fool them into thinking that you're one of them, boom candle.

 

#3: embrace the other wonderful things about fall

falling leaves, cooler weather, cinnamon, cloves, apple cider, warm bread, soup, oh god, soup!

fall is more than just "pumpkin" season, people. it's about the change of seasons and what a joyous time it can be. don't feel ashamed if you don't love pumpkin. cinnamon has been waiting for your call. mr. toffee has been knocking at your door. bring nutmeg in from the cold and offer him a place in your kitchen cupboard. they will thank you. you will thank you. 

now, enjoy this fall wallpaper from watercolor artist, oana befort:

have a happy fall, ya nut.