since the day joe asked me to marry him, one year ago today, the most common reaction i've received has not been warm congratulations or a "i'm so happy for you", but rather "you're too young to settle down", "you're both freelance musicians", or the ever popular, eye-wided, open-ended "wow..."
before i met joe, i was completely turned off to the idea of marriage. i had never seen a marriage that made me think that committing the rest of my life to one person was a remotely appealing way to live my life. joe opened my eyes to the idea that getting married doesn't mean "settling down". marriage doesn't mean that i have to end the life i'm currently living, or that i have to sacrifice my independence that i am so very proud of. getting married, to me, means that i've found the ultimate best friend and partner that wants to come along on this life adventure. it's as if i'm riding a bike up an incredibly steep hill and now i have someone who will ride with me in tandem, helping the both of us up the steep hill, and rejoicing together when we reach the top. marriage is not settling down. marriage is having a supportive, equal partner by my side who is only going to better me into achieving my life goals.
"you're too young". i''m 22 years old. joe is 25. we have been dating for 3 years. if you think that's young, that's your opinion. i'm saying to the world, by getting married at 22, that i've found the person i want to spend the rest of my life with, that i'm mature enough to make this serious decision, and that i know myself well enough to know that this man is the only one i want to marry. saying i'm too young has become personally offensive to me, implying that i don't know what i'm doing.
we are both freelance musicians. we are educators. we are also doing quite well. that's the end of that.
i would encourage everyone out there to think twice before you judge a young couple's situation. i know that i have been guilty of this too. when i see 18-year old girls getting married straight outta high school, i often raise my eyebrows. but at the end of the day, it's not my place to do anything but love on them.
also, i'm not an 18-year old girl. i'm a college graduate with a great career already established. and i'm marrying a wonderful, talented, wise, loving man in just 3 weeks.
i couldn't be happier.
on a lighter note... here are some of my favorite pics from the proposal and our engagement photos!